Have you ever been invited to introduce yourself in a group?
The usual stuff; name, where you’re based, what you do.
Fairly simple so far.
Though you may already have experienced a bit of anxiety as it comes to your turn:
What if I say the wrong thing? Oh, oh, she just remembered to thank the organizer sweetly, mustn't forget to do that. Will I be too voluble or too abrupt? Geez, got to make a good first impression...
And then comes the bombshell.
‘Say something that you’re proud about, talk about some of your achievements and wins.’
YOU. HAVE. GOT. TO. BE. KIDDING.
How many times have you been told NOT to ‘toot your own horn’? Not to boast and brag? Not to talk about yourself in glowing terms?
If you are, like me, a performer, you are someone who longs to share, to be in the spotlight, to say ‘Ta Daaaa!! I’m here. Look at me! Listen to me!’
(And BTW, you’ve worked darned hard at your craft, to be, well not perfect, but at least good enough to justify the attention.)
But I’m betting that you, ironically, got the ‘stop showing off’ message even more than most. No bragging rights for you!
As you were growing up, you came across an army of people – parents, authority figures, siblings, peers – who told you to pipe down, to be less of who you wanted to be. Less of who you were born to be, in fact.
And you may have reacted one of two ways.
Either by rebelling, becoming even MORE of who you are - and getting into a whole lot of trouble as you did so - or by conforming and becoming LESS, toning yourself down to avoid trouble.
Either way, it can be super-painful.
So, it’s hardly surprising that that assignment is so challenging.
It can bring up emotions and physical sensations and memories (OMG, first days in new school classes, or mistakes in group etiquette.)
I still cringe at one of my school report cards:
‘Jennifer must learn to be more modest. This will certainly help her in her relationship with her peers.’
Oof, message received and understood. And worked hard at. 🙂
If it still gives me a shot of shame and guilt now all these years later, how must I have felt back then?
Or a Facebook group I joined a few years ago. And I merrily offered tapping (for free) to anyone who was interested, and had my post summarily removed and a strict telling off.
I left the program, I was so mortified.
And then I used tapping on myself to clear the embarrassment and shame - and to remember not to blame myself - after all, my intentions were good, but next time, maybe it would be a good idea to check with group admin before sharing!
Do you have any similar memories? Traumatic stories which jump into your mind every time you have to do the personal introduction round? Events which still trigger strong emotions?
I had to do a LOT of tapping - and get a lot of encouragement from my coach - before I could acknowledge any of my memories.
And in the ‘real world’ this doesn’t get talked about much. Too squirmy-making.
So I WANNA HEAR YOU! Bragging rights for all!!
I’d LOVE to hear YOUR WINS. Comment below and I reply with heart stickers to every single one.
Time to CELEBRATE PROGRESS people – let’s make it easier for ourselves, not harder.